Abuse can be emotional, sexual or physical or psychological, and can happen in families, in relationships, to adults or children. Counselling can help to identify if a relationship is abusive, be the first place to explore complex emotional difficulties .It can also be a place to experience a healthy way of relating and forming a secure therapeutic relationship.
Usually a normal, healthy emotion, when anger cannot be controlled, it can cause problems. Unresolved anger may be turned on others, leading to relationship difficulties, and even violence. Uncontrollable anger could lead to difficulties at work, or in families. It may even cause someone to turn the anger inwards to themselves. Understanding triggers, patterns of behaviour, and learning to take responsibility for our anger can help to manage it. Counselling can assist in learning to understand how our anger can be causing difficulty, and how to deal with these issues.
It is normal to feel the strain of everyday life, but when the worry does not lift, and life becomes difficult, with physical and emotional symptoms impacting on how we live, it could be time to ask for help. Sometimes understanding how your anxiety originates can assist in creating a new perspective. Counselling can assist in understanding triggers and the effects of pressure from relationships, work and our own needs.
There are times when we feel low or sad and these times usually pass. Sometimes these feelings persist and begin to affect our day to day lives and that is when you might seek professional help. Symptoms can be emotional, behavioural or physical; difficulty sleeping and/or eating, feeling numb, restless or finding no pleasure in life. It might be difficult to remember things, or make decisions. You could be experiencing negative thoughts, poor self-esteem or using alcohol or drugs to make life seem better for a while. It is important to look after yourself, find support and ask for help. Counselling therapy can be of benefit. For more advice on self-care, and on specific types of depression, see Mind
Infidelity: Betrayal in relationships is often symptomatic of things that are already difficult within that relationship. The behaviour can also have its origins in early attachment and relationship experience. Counselling can help to contain the initial shock and distress, and then move into looking more deeply into patterns of relating and support to rebuild trust, and give you the support you need to make decisions that are right for you.
Low Self Esteem
Put simply, self-esteem is how we think of ourselves and value our own individuality. It can be high or low or just somewhere in the middle. When it is hard to feel secure in who you are, counselling can examine what may be going on for you. How we feel about ourselves begins in childhood, and how we experience life and our place in it, originate there. Some indicators of low self-esteem are having a distorted view of the self, your abilities and worth. You might feel unloved, or find it hard to be in relationship with others. You might be drawn into relationships that are not healthy for you. The therapeutic relationship is a place to explore these feelings and work together with a counsellor to identify your fears, accept who you are and challenge yourself to have the confidence to think differently.
- Panic Attacks
Occurring without any warning, panic attacks are frightening episodes of sheer terror, with clearly recognisable physical symptoms. Sufferers can experience a pounding heart, feeling sweaty, dizzy, weak, faint and nauseous. There can be chest pain and shortness of breath, with feelings like the world is closing in around you. These symptoms can make you feel like you are about to die, or that you are going crazy. They can be so terrifying that the fear of having another is debilitating, leading to constant anxiety. Counselling can assist in understanding your fears relating to the panic you feel, and explore underlying potential triggers and give you insight into coping with panic and anxiety. It also gives you the opportunity to explore your needs, including stress management strategies.
Relationship issues are usually integral in individual therapy work. We learn ways of relating to others in our early life, within our family dynamic. We can often become stuck in unhelpful relating patterns of behaviour, or in roles that we have had ascribed to us from very early on. Counselling can help us understand these ways of relating, how they might not be healthy for us, what impact they are having on how we connect with others in our present day lives. In counselling, conflict management skills and conflict resolution skills can be learnt, to improve our relationships and our own self-awareness and esteem.
A coping mechanism, bringing temporary relief to emotional and psychological problems, the act of self-harm is a way of exerting control over the body and of releasing built up emotions or distress. Self harming can be cutting or injuring the skin on the body, and also inflicting injury through excessive hair pulling, or burning or excessive use of alcohol, or other harmful substances. Self harm can also be used as a means of punishing yourself, or trying to deal with shame or guilt. Someone self harming may also exhibit signs of depression, or low mood, be withdrawn. Confiding in someone can be a start to understanding the triggers to the behaviour, and counselling can help with examining what is going on for the individual – be a safe place to voice fears and frightening thoughts.
If you are in crisis now and are having suicidal thoughts, contact Samaritans now on 08457 90 90 90. Having suicidal thoughts can be very frightening. You could feel helpless, alone, afraid, that there is no one there to help you. People do want to listen and to help – whether that is a crisis support worker on the end of a telephone or with a counsellor face to face. Do not be afraid to ask for help. Having suicidal thoughts does not make you weak or flawed. Someone may have suicidal thoughts after a traumatic loss, or bereavement, the breakdown of a relationship or as a result of severe depression. Counselling can help to make sense of where you are and what you do and why you are having these feelings.
Work Related Stress
Work-related stress: Stress is a normal part of life, and that includes our working life. When stress and pressure become excessive, this can lead to work-related stress. This can manifest in physical symptoms, absence from work and emotional exhaustion. Self-awareness and assertiveness are both key in dealing with stress in the work place. Counselling can offer support, help you in taking the pressure of yourself and focussing on what needs to happen for you to be able to cope ,both personally and professionally.